They come, they see, they startup!

by 12:56:00 PM 0 comments

Sometime in the 4.5 billion years after the formation of Earth, a unique species took birth. We now call them Homo sapiens.
Sometime in the 1.8 million years after the advent of the Homo sapiens, another unique species took birth. We now call them Startup founders.


Corporeally, Startup founders look just like you and me. They have a pair of eyes, a pair of ears (for display purposes only), a mouth and a pair of pair of limbs. Incorporeally, they are extraterrestrials.
No one knows exactly the who, the how, the what, the when, the where of their alienness. Nevertheless, multiple studies suggest a recurring pattern of distinctive traits.


They start early

How early you ask? Well, as early as a foetus can.




They were kid douch…I mean kid geniuses (whoa…that was close!)

I am sure you must have met your fair share of these insufferable crea…I mean insufferably adorable creatures.





They drop ideas on everyone…everytime.

Perhaps, you have lost count of the number of those precocious ‘ideas’. Let me remind you





Their summer camps were…wait…what is the word that I am looking for…ah…QUIRKY.

Well, what can I say, the early bird gets the worm or in this case, the funding.





Their college life revolved around identifying real time problems

…such as the one below. Of course this arrangement is temporary, at least untill they figure out a way to TurnDietCokeIntoWine.com! 




They get turned on by the word seed’…because it’s almost always followed by ‘funding'…

…and when that fails, there is always pseudo-meta-digital gibberish to fall back upon.





 

They changed the definition of persistence to parasite.

You think that it will end here but it doesn’t.


Because they changed the definition…remember?






When things don’t work out, they reluctantly bring their CVs out.

So, what’s so weird about that? Why don’t you take a look…





They just cannot not placebo about their startup…






Someday, they finally confuse an investor.

It’s ok if you don’t get it. It means your sanity is still intact.






They are a different level of improvisers.







They are a bunch of self-preening lords.






They spout Shakespearean dialogues like…



Or this…





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