6 Reasons why you should NOT stop being lazy

by 2:00:00 PM 0 comments
For centuries we have been kept in benightedness, an ignorance so cavernous as to snuff out the tiniest cerebral spark of mutiny. We have been made to believe in the evolutionary theory of  ‘Survival of the fittest’ when in actuality it is ‘Survival of the laziest’!

Allow us to ask you a few questions—

1. Are you already feeling too tired to scroll down?

2.  Are you always trying to enhance your bladder elasticity?

3.  Does your exercise regime solely consist of the gruelling trips to the fridge and the microwave?

4.  Is the underneath of your bed the Bermuda’s Triangle? (What goes under never comes out or simply ends up in a wormhole?)

If the answers to the above lie in the affirmative, Welcome to the Brotherhood mate!

Make haste (just this once) and join the propaganda with us! Read ahead (or make someone read it to you) to find out why being lazy is so amazing.

 


1. We are good at thinking out of the box (and eating out of it as well)


Let’s face it laxity has spawned one marvel after another. For instance, one man’s rightful reluctance to stretch his leg muscles gave us the ‘wheel’ (and eventually the escalator, the elevator, etc. ) while another’s, the pizza delivery system.









2. We are the living (or sleeping) icons for world peace


If only people were lazy enough to not get offended by the slightest stretching of voice boxes, half of the world’s troubles would never appear in the first place. Imagine going to all that trouble of beefing oneself up, keeping a rigorous regime, sketching out a modus operandi, carrying weapons, remembering to use them…just writing this has made us feel as if we have walked the equator twice!









3. We gave mankind the greatest gift ever…and it is called Sunday


Who do you think invented the weekend? Not some industrious, conscientious bloke who thought of the words ‘planning, executing and more planning’. If it were entirely left to us, there would be seven Sundays in a week.









4. We are highly Eco-friendly (because it takes the least effort) 


We think twice before we speak, we think thrice before we lift a limb and most times we don’t get past the thinking at all. The result— we imbibe only that what is necessary. The further result— less wastage, more energy savings, more for the under-privileged in this world.










5. We are in a perpetual state of nirvana



Meditation comes to us easy and at anytime. While lying on the couch, while staring vacantly at the ceiling, while figuring out shapes in the clouds, while sitting on the loo, while hibernating.











6. We gave rise to the whole service app industry 



Yes, we created a multi billion dollar industry just by refusing to do anything and everything. Laundry at a call (when we have turned every cloth into a reversible and the only cloth remaining is nudity), cab at a touch (for those rare occasions where we have to provide proof of our existence), food with a chat (when the urge to satisfy hunger overcomes the reluctance to move our jaws).








Need we say more?